Using Memento Mori for Success
This post was originally published on The Stoic Student
If you or a loved one is struggling with their mental health and/or is considering suicide, please contact the numbers below.
Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 800–273–8255
Crisis Text Line: Text HOME to 741741
Below are two students’ perspectives on Memento Mori.
Most people would agree on the idea that reminding oneself of their own imminent death is negative and pessimistic thinking. Reflecting on death, paradoxically, can be a freeing and positive experience, but the way you do it matters, because it might bring unwanted side effects.
The Stoics have been using this practice of reminding themselves of their ephemeral life for some time. They use something called Memento Mori, a mental exercise of sorts which translates to “ Remember that you must die”. Memento Mori reminds the person that like life, death is also a constant and will come in time, and that the challenges you face now aren’t that scary in the grand scheme of things. No matter what you face, it pales in comparison to death and shows us that even death isn’t that bad.
Humans are instinctively afraid to die, but this fear actually makes them afraid to live. Yes, you heard me right. If you understand that everything will eventually pass, everything will begin to feel so much easier. This thinking reduces the fear and anxiety we carry in life, because every situation is contrasted with death and allows us to examine it plainly. Risk, pain, humiliation, failure: it won’t measure up to “the end”. It allows us to live however we like, without fear holding us back.
Memento Mori, in its paradoxical nature, has made me more confident in life. Because I know that no matter how bad it gets, life will move on towards that final destination we call death. This exercise not only helps us relieve fear, but it can also make us more productive, and more bold. Reminding yourself that you’re going to die one day, if thought of correctly, can spur us to get out of bed, take risks, and accomplish something with our lives. Our time on this planet is precious. It’s a gift that we can lose at any moment. And reminding ourselves that can serve as the match we need to ignite the fire within us.
Hanging on the wall next to my bed is a small print with three objects. On the left is a rose, in the center is a skull, and on the right is an hourglass. What does it mean? Life, death, and the time in between. Yes, it is morbid. However, that is the point.
The Stoics reminded themselves that they could leave life at any moment. To a Stoic, death is not something to worry about. It is a one true constant. It is outside of their control. So if it’s something that is bound to happen, and something we can’t do much to stop, why worry about it? You will die. I will die. We all will die. But what does matter, and what’s in our control, is how we die. Let me explain.
Seneca illustrates the power of memento mori: “As it is with play, so it is with life — what matters is not how long the acting lasts but how good it is.” In other words, it does not matter if you die today or 100 years from. It does matter that you do your best to live a good life in the meantime. Not one where you passively move through, doing the bidding of whatever life throws at you. But one on your terms. By your code. In line with your values.
Memento mori gives me perspective. I will die like everyone else. I don’t know when it will happen. Maybe tomorrow. Maybe when I’m 98. But regardless, I can live my life with energy, enthusiasm, and justice.
You must live each and every moment like it is your last. What do you want to be remembered for? Act accordingly.
Originally published at https://www.thestoicstudent.org on December 12, 2020.